Dave

I get why some sports are divided by men & women but some like archery seem unnecessary to split up.

I asked if I should wake her up for the 5:30am USA v France basketball game & she said no. She must be planning to just stay up for it.

I am simultaneously bummed and impressed that Mac’s dictation spells “woot” as “w00t”.

I think I could make the Olympic volleyball team if I could always be the guy who looks like he’s going to spike it, but then doesn’t.

Mirroring Olympics from Mac to AppleTV, remote trackpad app on iPhone, reading live commentary on iPad. I’m living a 90s AT&T You Will ad.

I think Cook Islands has the greatest % of their population in the Olympics: 8 in 11,000, or 0.07%. If the US had that it’d have 218K in.

What’s the term for getting a to-go box out of guilt for not eating everything you ordered?

Finally. t.co/saHIfjtW

I’m at Cafe Mox w/ @gatzby_ t.co/mfy6sORH

Hearing the couple words before I hit skip to next commercial forms a Burroughs-esque short fiction each ad break.

I’m at Bartell Drugs (Seattle, WA) t.co/1WWH8vKr

I’m at Cactus (Seattle, WA) t.co/mYALyAS9

The problem with misusing “literally” isn’t what it does to your point, but what it does to other, unbelievable but actually true, points.

I learned 1) who Demetria Lovato is (@ddlovato) 2) her fans are #lovatics 3) she accidentally tweeted to me (@_), freaking the Lovatics out.

Best @stevemartintogo songs he didn’t play: Let’s Keep the Minimum Wage Right Where She Is (a protest song) & Angry Birds Lvl 7.

I never go to any shows with people my age. (@ Chateau Ste. Michelle Winery for Emmylou Harris + more w/ 24 others) t.co/WTcjnuoQ

Another day at the consulate. t.co/7unr1jxk

Cancel your cancel? Ok your cancel? Cancel your ok? t.co/Rje14Iw5

All reality TV contests are based on the Miss America pageant.

Silly me thinking a light jacket would be warm enough to watch the sunset IN LATE JULY.

Pro-tip: it is almost never necessary to swing your car door all the way open into traffic. I’m not quite sure how that isn’t obvious.

Already thinking about how it will suck when @stubhub buys @seatgeek.

Hand drawn chalk menus add an extra half-star automatically. @ Athina Grill t.co/dN7RSR7k

When you pull up to a 4-way stop at the same time as someone else, just remember: tie goes to the runner.

Not sure how this works out: Seattle bans plastic bags, I now have to buy bags to throw out the cat litter.