Dave

Free hip-hop name - guaranteed to get your call taken by a show promoter: Jay’s E.

Screw this reversible USB in 2016 idea. Why aren’t more plugs round, so you don’t even have to think about which way they are?

Million dollar holiday idea: you upload a photo of your house, you get mailed a kit of graham crackers, frosting & directions to make it.

A hitman has the rare job where the longer he procrastinates, the more likely his work gets completed.

Looks like @Cloudup solved the retina screenshot issue. I’d love to try them app out. t.co/W7biDI5o0…

Monty Python’s Black Knight page on Wikipedia has my favorite “See also” section: t.co/VSHBdzLU6…

RIP my Rick Roll on the footer of Amazon’s home page: t.co/5ht26fAID…

I made a little scene to celebrate our @darth holiday tradition: t.co/7t1AP6syQ…

Can we also get someone to trademark & enforce use of Black Friday & Cyber Monday so everyone can shut up about it? #alsodoorbuster

I hope drone deliveries get patented so you can avoid octocopter noise by just not living within 10 miles of an Amazon warehouse.

Paul McCartney has 8 grandchildren (Arthur, Elliot, Sam, Sid, Miller, Bailey, Beckett, Reiley) but sadly no Vera, Chuck, or Dave.

I’ll admit I didn’t expect to find a detailed tale of building a golf simulator interesting & yet here we are: t.co/LqEsEjpSd…

Take a moment tonight and enjoy the silence of not hearing dozens of buzzing drones delivering crap everywhere always.

I’m at First Watch - Webster Groves - @wgfirstwatch (Saint Louis, MO) t.co/oU4ptGXmM…

If I were Dusty Baker, every time I saw players practicing elaborate celebratory handshakes I’d walk up & whisper, I invented the High Five.

Crap, just realized the puppet shows I’m doing for @___ don’t pass the Bechdel test.

We went without a turkey today, so apparently for karmic balance a bird smashed into our front door.

Thinking about leaning to code the baby way: I try random things till the compiler tells me I’ve done something right.

The marketing industry is terrible at marketing the marketing industry. If you’re “found out” to be a marketer, you’re immediately evil.

Hey, a thing I’ve been working on (with @smiller) for the past month or so is now live. It’s a mediocre forum: t.co/6milAOke2…

When it comes to doing good on the Internet, @anildash is Superman and @Mike_FTW is Batman.

An under-appreciated skill of Mozeliak’s is that he can wear a bow tie without being That Guy Who Wears A Bow Tie. t.co/3sSTkGV71…

Getting up early enough to see what those Australians are on about.

The nice thing about being in central time is you can talk crap about all the West Coasters in the morning and they’ll never see it.

Wondering how it might turn out if I taught my kid that all the Norman words were profane & all the Anglo-Saxon words were civilized.