It’s self-serving, but would it really be that hard for Twitter to verify 1-character accounts & ensure they’re not stolen? There’s 37.
It helps no one to spread the almost certainly incorrect idea that these usernames are actually worth much money.
City occupancy permit says we’re not allowed to have more than 9 kids here. I thought we’d just have 1, but now thinking 10 out of spite.
1283 characters about a 40-character tweet. Read to get a sneak peek at awful reporting we’ll get on Superbowl ads: t.co/n5DAOOpWD…
The Little Prince gives us some quality tweet advice: “Trying to be witty leads to lying, more or less.”
You Will Believe A Man Has Cat Eyes. I convinced @dogwelder to try @seejanemarie’s @thehairpin make-up tutorial: t.co/vfB1E5ui3…
I wonder how many people got the law firm joke on Parks & Recreation. t.co/2pV2PYuJf…
So far, the three people @___ can most consistently recognize & identify by name are me, his mom, and Batman.
I know what we agreed to, but just a few more days and I think I’ll be able to accurately evaluate it. t.co/R5v4ZgJcw…
Our nursery blackout curtains work as an accidental camera obscura. t.co/RnQw6odMG…
When I google a specific error message & there are literally zero results, it’s like I’m in a Twilight Zone episode. A really boring one.
My wife says that looking on Twitter and Facebook is not the correct response to tornado sirens going off. I’m thinking tweeting is right.
McDonald’s left out female Adventure Time characters for their “boy” Happy Meal toy, but didn’t notice BMO identifies as both male & female.
Seriously confused at Yahoo as the highest traffic site (http://t.co/5tMixYcjW1) Sincerely: Do you go there? For what?
Non-Governmental Organizations should adopt the third verse of “Bingo Is My Name-o” as their theme song.
A browser extension replacing the title of every page I visit with the next sentence in War & Peace, so I end up accidentally reading it.
These Google ads advertising buying Google ads makes me feel like I’m living in The Truman Show: t.co/tUbqsbBAf…
I was watching the neighbors to figure out when to take down Christmas decorations but I think I accidentally got in a Mexican Stand-off.
The toughest part of installing @Nest smoke alarms: getting the right angles aligned. Also, ugh, heights. t.co/TVGpjxXXV…
So, I may have accidentally taught @___ that all animals roar like a lion because it’s his cutest sound.