Dave

2016: A lot of terrible things happen for no good reason. 2017: A lot of terrible things happen for a fully known reason.

Pro-tip: put all your glitter-coated decorations away today, because everyone will just think your glitter coating is celebratory tonight.

I love that “no, daddy, not that robot, the other robot” is a reasonable thing for @___ to say.

Powerpoint’s “equalize character height” is the worst typography option I have ever seen. t.co/oW5hlFrlL…

Idea: a browser that never ever overrides me while I’m typing in the url/search bar.

Is there a works-from-home Slack group where other work-from-homers can help me find a suit & tie dickey for video conference meetings?

Ooh, they’re installing a new Pokèstop! t.co/jBwPU4FzE…

I’m guessing some Amazon employees are not having a good holiday break. t.co/2CE7qkbYg…

One of the top ten things about Christmas is heading to bed and realizing you’re already in your pajamas.

The most convincing evidence of the veracity of astrology is the unavailability of specific signs in horoscope merch. Pisces love astrology.

“I know how to put that together, I watched videos of it!” says @___. Finally, all those toy unboxing videos pay off.

From now on, I’m deciding what our family traditions are solely by Twitter poll results.

[poll] Presents go under the Christmas tree…

Sorry @marsbotapp, I couldn’t think of a not totally crazy way to say to the staff “my robot friend says hi.” t.co/QudGUSPTu…

Looks like it was Pokemon Go on Apple Watch by 8 days. t.co/bEstZwtAD…

Site idea: spoiler-free movie reviews that exist solely to lower your expectations for otherwise incredibly hyped movies.

Years of grinding my own coffee beans & I just learned: adding 3 or 4 drops of water eliminates static while grinding & makes way less mess.

I like Christmas t.co/VwPCGZZk4…

Wish I could see every Twitter account I’ve made. I stumble on them in email searches. Like @christofaux, which I do not at all remember.

Completely fictional idea for a remake/mash-up movie -

Red Dawn + War Games: Russia invades the US & occupies the government via hacking.

Ok everyone, I finished Mad Men, so it’s ok to talk about it now.

Parade floats are the Mechanical Turks of autonomous cars.

I think Siri is trolling me. t.co/QvmQYle3V…

I finally had an excuse to use the Droste effect on the wine label I designed (with @matthewmatic) for today’s t.co/Fblwwfxx1… wine. t.co/LCKdyHDF5…

If they want a War on Christmas, give them a war. My wife @__ made a shirt for the cause: t.co/L7Cduj08Z… t.co/RyDuxP37e…