Dave

I get that many don’t care, but do any customers prefer justified text on Kindle? Amazon’s core principal is Customer Obsession. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

I vaguely get why it was first called the Midwest but it’s dumb that it’s not just called the Middle now. (Since Central America is taken.)

My “you have to take as many bites as your age” strategy backfired when @___ asked how old I was.

Live tweeting & periscoping a police stand-off in your backyard is a pretty good excuse. t.co/tOGAExJGQ…

The two lightest players in baseball weigh almost exactly what the one heaviest weighs: t.co/TxHitxF1s…

I like to see how much I can get Siri to say in an answer: t.co/qbGItqWcz…

I’ll give @CrossyRoad the award for doing the most with the simplest premise. Disney Crossy Road makes the game fun, yet again.

If Monet went to Disney World t.co/ee2cJBkO1…

I like an app that gives me positive feedback for literally doing nothing: t.co/QUOSv90of…

I’m guessing it’s not a coincidence that Twitter Moments has no mention of the exploding watermelon.

My kid’s preschool used a @makerbot to 3D-print these awesome lollipops after @___ suggested they should be spirals: t.co/0BArJB1d0…

How have you survived without hearing a white guy rap about that Rogue One trailer? @matthewmatic to the rescue! t.co/ZFdsgXGni…

Great to see @twitter add @marthalanefox who clearly uses Twitter (17k tweets). OTOH, they added @hughjohnston who now has…one tweet.

“You won’t be disappointed” is the saddest hype ever.

Facebook is pretty sure we should give them a bunch of money to advertise our hibernating turtle video: t.co/RXGnDKdLs…

When you just see the headline and think…shit, I bet the state I live in is one of these. And you’re right. t.co/5Bim6dTSP…

A 1950s Golden Book about Daddies & the jobs they do and a new one about Robots & how they now do all those jobs: t.co/vGX6wRlYy…

I’m happy to say my wife @__ is back on Twitter, unsuspended, and sharing her new cross-stitch skillz: t.co/oAXdICA7w…

According to my wife @__, this is exactly what I look like: t.co/dXQdVCizt…

Introducing @___ to the idea of obsessive book organizing. t.co/bH8aSEHoL…

In ten years I’ll quote this exact tweet and tell you it’s from ten years ago and you’ll feel old.

An app that takes a photo of my hair’s crazy cowlicks and gives me an optimal combing guide.

To celebrate April Fools’ Day, I guess, my wife’s @__ Twitter account is still suspended.

So many sites try to be clever & funny but end up annoying & frustrating. At @wearemeh, we aim for annoying & frustrating and hit the mark.

A decent summary of “so what’s Dave been up to?” t.co/NN7fKsF7F…