I’m so busy even my spam calendar appointments are conflicting. t.co/qEwbcNvRQ…
Happy Tree Service : Trees :: Make America Great : America t.co/M3kz52oOM…
I’ll be gravely disappointed if we get anything other than a deeper hole out of this deal, @CAH t.co/ACZIXHS6K…
Last year I stored Christmas decorations in the basement (1 flight) instead of attic (2 flights). I bet I’ll weigh a pound more from that.
Having trouble deciding which of the goldfish in @___’s class has the best name:
Georgie POW! Captain America Daddy
Booted up my iPad 1 today. I still miss how clear shift & caps lock were. t.co/rPECzYKYc…
This qualifies as a productive day t.co/iJLn7FUbt…
In need of small victories, I’m wandering the house with a screwdriver looking for things to tighten.
On the plus side, I’ve been getting better at chess since I can’t stand reading or hearing the news.
If I happen to catch you when you’re checking in to see if you should start checking Twitter again: no, not yet.
It’s a terrible time for Twitter and Facebook to remind me what my friends were talking about 12 hours ago.
Nice of @twitter to create a whole feature dedicated to getting me to read my brother’s tweets. t.co/w0d53gAPm…
Check out @__’s awesome Stranger Things embroidery in tonight’s Famous Fictional art show: t.co/ICyvuvn4u…
Unexpected perils of getting my coffee to drink outside on the hills of San Francisco. t.co/j0TcGjaeL…
“As a reminder, Galaxy 7 Notebooks are not allowed on this flight.”
People say naming doesn’t matter.
Great timing, I bought that @lonelysandwich CMRA Apple Watch band for my birthday. (If you want $20 off, use this: t.co/IBupsmtOF… )
An app that counts how many times I hit my keyboard’s Escape key in a day, so I can predict how annoyed I’d be by the new Macbook Pro.
This is one of my favorite interview quotes: “I don’t want to be quoted on anything,” said Christina Cox t.co/iKav4DfCa…