Dave

That wonderful realization that you still have some coffee in your mug & the terrible disappointment when you taste how lukewarm it now is.

I only watched the first minute of the #USA #GHA game, so I assume it’s 67-0 now.

Instead of getting the World’s Tiniest Wireless Earbuds, I’m just going to pretend I got them and lost them already.

I’d like a coffee mug boldly proclaiming I’m in the top half of all dads.

Would it be legal to put Molina in as a pitching coach mid-game?

Who originated “say cheese” to smile, and how soon after the invention of photography did it become common?

My parenting style is to have no idea when you’re supposed to teach a kid a thing & accidentally teach @___ stuff a bit ahead of time.

Seems like someone should start thinking about what to do after IPv4.

The greatest trick Spotify ever pulled was convincing iTunes execs they didn’t exist.

Thinking about @meyerweb’s loss of his 6-year-old daughter & his strength in sharing it with us: t.co/wOrQh72Ew… #663399Becca

Rudolph’s nose doesn’t actually glow, it’s just shiny. A matte vs gloss type of thing. Not particularly helpful in guiding flying sleighs.

All blankets should be twice as big as they are. #blanketstatement

I was home sick the day MTV played 24 hours of homemade videos for Madonna’s True Blue & I watched them all, so that’s why I’m like this.

If you’re wee having trouble growing something, I recommend garage gutters. It seems they’re the most fertile place in the world. Whew.

Discovered that a logo I designed is on an Indy race car. #woot t.co/ElFX50OGZ…

Rainier than Mt. Rainier: t.co/7kDYE7vlq…

Three straight weeks of seeing this sitting in someone’s yard, their marketing doesn’t lie. t.co/U8gcLrNkI…

What’s the name for “fear of using anyone’s name because maybe you’re remembering wrong”?

One of the first Dole Whips in St. Louis. (Newly at the zoo.) @ Saint Louis Zoo t.co/IBB6hhcdj…

My @everyword final word guess is: zzz

Hate all these people who act like they’re all into donuts one day a year & just ignore the importance of donuts the rest of the time.

The awesomely named Piggy Ward has the record for consecutive times reaching base (17). Carpenter has 10 right now.

Reality show idea: pro athletes play kid sports. Man U kickball, Miami Heat tetherball, Olympic Volleyball team Foursquare, rugby Red Rover.

A perfect seat for @___ t.co/cJFN1qozO…

I can tell @___ is getting in a better mood when I’m singing to him because he starts requesting to skip to the next track.